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Resigned

February 19, 2010

I signed up for a new account on eharmony last night. If nothing comes up between now and Sunday (in the form of A getting in touch), I’m going back online. I’m not happy about it, but it has to be done. I’ve been patient, but I can’t put my life on hold indefinitely. I respect his need for space, and I get that he’s away and working, but I need him to respect my needs as well, and that means staying in touch. It’s a two-way street.  I refuse to assume anything. Been there, done that, and it bit me in the ass.

I have no idea what to think anymore about the dating process. I’ve read numerous books and conflicting information abounds. I have had varying degrees of advice from my friends, from “just move on” to “just be patient”. I just don’t know what to do. I try and play it cool, and it doesn’t work out. I try and be open about what I’m feeling, and it doesn’t work out. Who do I have to be? What do I have to say? Or not say? I can’t change my very nature just to catch a guy. But when will I find one who accepts me for me?

Sigh.

I wish the psychic’s prediction was going to come true, but at this point, it doesn’t look like it’s going to.

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